


I'm Sorry Isn't Enough

by orphan_account



Category: Shameless (US)
Genre: M/M, The life of the Gallagher-Milkovich clan
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-14
Updated: 2015-12-14
Packaged: 2018-05-06 16:48:24
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,837
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5424515
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ian's sorry, Mickey's desperate and doesn't want to show it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I'm Sorry Isn't Enough

**Author's Note:**

> So I'm going through this little series and rewriting some of the shit because when I reread these stories I didn't like how they turned out, hope you guys enjoy.

*Edited 2/4/16*

It's been one year since Mickey has seen Ian in person. Seven months since Mickey stopped texting and calling Ian, trying to win back the heart of his first and only love. Two months since Mickey got drunk and knocked on the Gallagher's door, only to be told Ian wasn't there. And one week since Mickey last let a tear slip thinking about the red head who somehow captured his heart. It's been one year of heartbreak and misery for Mickey Milkovich.

It's been one year since Ian broke up with Mickey, in hopes to better himself. Seven months since Ian was finally able to turn his phone on and not cry at what he saw. Two months since Fiona called him and told him about a drunk Mickey asking for Ian before collapsing on the porch and leaving before she woke up the next morning. It's been one day since Ian came back to Chicago, medicated and stable, for once since he was 17.

"What the fuck do you want?" Iggy asks, scratching his stomach before lighting a cigarette and glaring down at Ian intimidatingly. Ian swallows the fear that Iggy will just slam the door in his face and clears is throat before speaking. "I was wondering if Mickey was around?" His voice sounds so calm, it was the exact opposite of how he felt. Iggy's eyes turn to slits, calculating Ian's every move, looking for an ulterior motive. "Yeah, he's around." Iggy states bluntly, making Ian squirm a bit at the intensity of his gaze. "Well, can I see him?" "No." Ian's head snaps up to look at Iggy, who was casually leaning against the doorway, looking as if the last thing he was gonna do is let Ian see Mickey. "I need to talk to him, it's important." "I'm sure it is." Iggy says sarcastically before stepping back and slamming the door, quite literally, in Ian's face.

Letting out a deep sigh, Ian runs a hand through his long hair before lighting a cigarette and sitting on the first step.

It was impressive really, how long Ian had been sitting on the porch, looking like he wasn't gonna budge. If Iggy wasn't here, Mickey probably would've went outside already, but instead he was stuck in the living room, staring out the window at Ian's back. He had missed that dark red hair, longing to be able to ruffle his hair affectionately, while acknowledging he was a huge sap in his head but never admitting it.

When Mickey was first warned by Iggy that his old lover was outside, Mickey felt hopeful but at the same time had bile rising in the back of his throat. He immediately fast walked out of his room and to the front door, before he could open it Iggy was there grabbing his shoulder and roughly yanking him away from the door. " _He_ broke up with _you._ We're Milkoviches, we don't run back like no bitches." It took a lot of self restraint, but Mickey managed to not walk out the door and instead looked at Ian through the window. The first sight was like a punch to the face. Staring at him was like picking at a cut on your lip, you know it's gonna hurt but you still do it. And he did keep doing it, he kept staring. Ian must've smoked almost his whole pack and the sun had gone from high in the sky to barely on the horizon. Every so often, Iggy would come over and put a hand on his shoulder, a way of saying he was there.

Iggy still lived at the Milkovich household, the rest of their siblings off doing God knows what. Iggy was the one there for Mickey through the breakup, hell he even helped out with Yevgeny if need be. It was surprising at first, if anyone in their household was expected to be there for anyone, it would be Mandy. But she wasn't there. She had fucked off the Indiana and completely ended all contact with her family, didn't even have the same phone number. 

Colin was living with some friends of his while Jamie was in jail, finally getting pinned with murder. Mickey could say life had been good since Ian left, he couldn't say happy or perfect, sure as hell not joyful, but it was good. He was still scamming, which earned him a good amount of money, Svetlana had actually been nice to him, most of the time, and he had his son, Yev. That qualified as good in his books. 

Mickey is knocked from his thoughts by the familiar Russian accent, "Carrot boy?" Svetlana was walking to the house with Yevgeny on her hip and a scowl on her face. "Go away before I kill you." Svetlana hadn't threatened somebody and been serious about it in awhile, so Mickey imagined she was feeling very satisfied. "I just wanna talk to Mickey." "You don't get talk, you get bat to the head if you don't get off property." Ian was quick to move out of her way, letting her up the porch where she ignored him rambling about needing to see Mickey. He made sure to move away from the window when Ian looked his way, but he was sure Ian had seen him by the fact he said, "Mickey?"

Svetlana barged in, slamming the door behind her before looking for Mickey. "Why is he here?" Even Mickey didn't have the answer to that question. "Well, I think he was wanting to talk to Mickey." Iggy says sarcastically, a small smirk on his face. Lana rolled her eyes and set Yev on the couch and sitting beside him. "I mean, why does orange boy want to talk?" "The fuck should I know?" Mickey asks defensively when they both looked at him. "You date him-" "Yeah, I _dated_ him. That was like a fucking year ago."

Svetlana waved her hand dismissively, "Doesn't matter. I want him off porch." And with that, Lana picks up Yevgeny and walks away, making both Milkoviches roll their eyes.

"I'm gonna tell him to fuck off." Iggy says walking to the door, but before opens it Mickey grabs his arm. "I'll do it." Iggy gives him a look. That look that says, 'the minute you walk out there you won't be able to make him leave' you know the look. "What? You don't think I can tell him to go fuck himself? I was denying him for a long time, don't think I can't do it again." Shaking his head, Iggy walks to the kitchen, the sound of a beer can opening accompanies him seconds later. Taking a second to collect himself, Mickey rolls his shoulders back and puts on a blank expression before opening the door.

Ian had spent the past ten months in a mental facility. He knew it would be easier to get on his medication if he was forced to take it each day, even when he didn't want to. At first, he was fine without medication. Sure, he had bad times but he was eventually back to his chipper self, then he noticed how the people around him were. Fiona would look at him in sadness, Debbie and her teenage self looked annoyed by him most of the time, and Carl, well Carl always treated him the same. When he saw this, he realized he needed help. If not for him than the people around him and most importantly, for Mickey. He needed to get better so that he could be with Mickey, so that he could deserve Mickey. So he and Fiona looked up different hospitals, she was more than eager while he felt like he was treading on dangerous ground. Finally they found one that was accommodating, and didn't seem like Ian would hate it. 

It was hard at first, but after a couple of months his medication was on track and he was only having slip ups every couple so often. When they finally told him he could leave, he was ecstatic but also felt nervous. He knew it would be hard for him and Mickey to mend everything, hell who even knew if Mickey was single, but Ian was willing to risk it all. 

When he heard the front door open, his head whipped around, expecting Iggy to come out with a gun threatening to shoot his ass. But it was something so much better. It was Mickey, looking stone cold and a bit mad, but he still managed to knock the breathe out of Ian. Micky looked at Ian for a split second before looking past him at the quickly fading sunset. "Go away, Gallagher." Mickey's voice was heartbreaking. He tried to sound tough and he succeeded but Ian could hear that bit of sadness in his voice and it felt like his ribs were shrinking. "Please just let me-" "I said go away." 

It was almost frustrating how stubborn Mickey is, but it was another thing he loved about him.

"Please." Ian knew how desperate he sounded, but he couldn't find it in himself to give a fuck. Mickey must've heard it, too. He nodded his head so fast, Ian almost didn't see it, but luckily he did. 

"Mickey, I'm sorry." Mickey scoffs at the admission. "Yeah, well sorry isn't enough."

"I know it isn't and I know that I screwed up and you have no reason to forgive me. The one time you are willing to be completely open with me, the one don't have your guard up and I rejected you." Ian pauses and looks in Mickey's eyes to find him finally staring back. "I was so scared to come here today, but now I don't know why. Even if you reject me today, or tomorrow, or the day after that, I will _never_ give up. I will always love you, I will always be in love with. Nothing can change that, not even my own stupidity. I love you, even if you don't love me back." By the end of his speech, Ian is panting with wide eyes. 

"You're a fucking idiot." Ian is all ready to go home and brainstorm ways to make it up to Mickey. "And for some reason, I still love you." It takes Ian a second to understand what Mickey was saying, but when he does a grin like no other spreads across his face. Mickey lets a smirk surface and Ian moves forward, ready to kiss him but Mickey puts a hand to his chest, making Ian give him a confused look. 

"Yeah, I still love you. But you're still gonna have to earn my trust back. You can't just waltz into town and expect me to take you back. You gotta work for it, bitch." Ian's face hurts from how wide his grin is, but he can't bring himself to be bothered. This is, after all, one of the best days of his life.


End file.
